I have not written in far too long, instead I've been on 9gag...and =S I really don't know. My days have sort of melted away. It's been about 10 days since I got back from the snow and I can't remember what I've done other than start my new job. According to my calendar I have also:
Eaten at Santos Pizzeria Canley Heights.
The food wasn't good, pricey for the low quality and laggy service considering we were one of two couples in the store AND you could taste that the food had been refrigerated for days. Actually that's unfair, the bruschetta topping had been in the fridge for days, I don't think the rest of the food was. The tomatoes had gotten watery and old and you could tell it had just come out from the fridge since it was super cold. I can't remember what the name of what I ordered but it was meant to be something similar to Chicken with a boscaiola sauce. The sauce was too overpowering and the mash was gluggy. Tim got pizza, I didn't try it but I heard no complaints and later when we got pulled over for an RBT the cop started raving about how good the pizza is there...seeing as it is a Pizzeria maybe I just chose wrong lol. BUT in my defense I did not know this until I looked up the name now. Either way the waiter was friendly and attentive AND they kept my phone for me when I left it behind.
Drank tea at Tee's Cupcakes:
I had been dying to go there for a few reasons, mainly because of my newly found obsession with cupcakes. Also I know someone who works there, I tried their macaroons awhile back and they were awesome. First and only time I have had macaroons so I don't have much to compare it to but I liked it. It was like eating cookies, cookie dough, ice cream AND (insert fruit here). Plus sonjae keeps raving about it on her blog. To be honest I was a tad disappointing, I was expecting ultra cuteness or some sort of nice interior design but it felt really clashy. Like the display wall side was pretty but then you turn around and look at the .
seating and it looks like cheapo cabra restaurant. OH WELL.
We were in a bit of a rush. We came in as they were closing so we slammed down two cups of tea before leaving. Tim loved the citrus flavored tea he got so much that he bought a box and has been drinking and hoarding it ever since. I had the ?blushing geisha? ...although that might have been a drink Tim ordered at Fat Panda =S Either way it was nice, I'm not a fan of tea...or any beverage really. I'm like a camel. It takes me like 4 days to get through one bottle of water. I did however, like that it not only smelt good but I could actually taste it. Most of the time I don't care about tea because it usually smells awesome but the taste is always the same. BLAND and makes my tongue really rough and dry for some reason =S This didn't =] But not enough for me to go back and drink more tea.
There were lots of little chocolates I wanted to try for the sake of it but I'm not really a huge fan of sweets. I just like decorating cupcakes and then don't eat them. I was keen to see what they made and got stuck looking at a little Happy Mothers day cupcake display....wasn't mothers day ages ago? :S Anywho, it was really pretty, with the exploding fondant design and some fondant butterflys. Cute pastel colours.
Fondant decorating is my next big goal in decorating. I've never worked with it or even seen where they sell it but I'm not too fussed. I finally had some about a month ago and it tastes disgusting. Plus I have a long way to go before I'm content with my piping skills, I've only practiced twice now. My bag ripped. SO the first thing I'm buying is a piping kit. EXCITE.
Ate sushi
Twice. With Nghi at Sushi Bay and with Warren, Dave and Tim at Fat Panda. Sushi will never be a meal to me, that stuff soooo isn't filling. But it gives me my tuna fix. Saddly the long anticipated 'Tsunami' drinks from Fat Panda were terrible. They were so awesome the first time we tried them but this time they tasted bitter as opposed to sweet. I also tried their Blushing Geisha drink which was a little better. It felt odd there that night. I'm pretty sure it was a Friday night but it was slightly dead (Fat Panda) compared to Holy Basil and compared to how extremely busy it was around Feb this year. They offered us a free plate of something that looked like raw salmon with some brown sauce. It was nice. It made me suspicious haha. Either the food was going to go off and they didn't want to waste it OR they're loosing business for some reason and are trying to please.
Oh also had some good green tea ice cream at Fat Panda, it had this wafer in it that tasted so good! Different texture and taste to your usual wafer. Although not as good as the Green Tea Ice cream I had in the city once.
Chilled out at Little Star
Hung out with Dave, Warren and Tim. Got more green tea ice cream, better at Fat Panda.
Saw Gangshow:lol at mikel. It was so exciting watching him dance, the show...not so crash hot but what can you expect. I was pretty impressed with their lighting and props though ^.^
Started Uni:New bio lecturer...=D TEHEHEEE! I've only got two subjects this semester but they seem so full on, I don't know how the others are coping with 4 =S
Started "working" as a nurse:I've only had my corporate orientation so far which I enjoyed...I don't get why everyone is always so BOO it's so boringggg. The people hosting it, the people listening, other people who have done it. I loved it, it got me all excited to start working and I thought the hosts did a very good job of making it entertaining. I'm most excited about the courses the hospital offers. I want to get more certificates done. Just to say I have them I guess...like collecting badges ^.^ Also, the hospital has a gym which is only $8 or $6 a week which is brand new and 24/hrs with classes coming soon. I have another orientation day tomorrow =]
Finally sent in my newgrad application:Now that I haven't failed and sent in my application for an internship next year things are locked in. I can't take the easy way out anymore =[ I need to pass and get my shit together =[ There's no going back.
AND NOW. What I was meant to write about...except it's an hour since I started writing and I'm not really bothered. May as well.
Le SnowI went to the snow for 8 days with Tim, his (extended) family and a few of Tim's friends: Jamie, Uly + Katie. I kept my cool before leaving but somewhere, somewhat dormant inside of me was incredibly scared, nervous and anxious. I had a gut feeling I would be bad at snowboarding, not because it was my first time doing a snow sport but because I'm uncoordinated, fat and a clutz. I was worried it would put a strain on my relationship with Tim and his family. I was scared his family would decide I was unfit to be his girlfriend and I was worried I would ruin Tim's favorite and most anticipated time of the year. Needless to say I felt a lot of pressure but I didn't feel like dragging Tim down with me before we had even left, there was still a chance it would all be fine.
It was not fine.
Despite the trip being pretty pricey (compared to a million other places we could have gone for cheaper) and me being miserable 80% of the time, I don't feel like it was a waste of time. I haven't decided why yet...and it might just be me trying to look for the best in things (SOMETHING THAT NEVER TRULY HAPPENS WITH ME, I'm a pessimist at heart) but despite how I felt I don't regret anything.
When we were arranging the trip I decided to only pay for 3 days of snowboarding lessons (as opposed to the 5 days that the girls got). I had a feeling I wouldn't take to the sport and would rather chill out than pay an extra $400 to do something I can't accomplish. The option was still available to pay for more if by some miracle things worked out. Everyone was sort of annoyed at me for starting off with this outlook, expecting the worst but I really was just being realistic and in the end I wasn't wrong.
So the way the trip worked was we would get up at 5:30am every day, get our gear on, have breakfast, leave at 7am for the snow and arrive around 8am. Get more of our gear together and me Dianne and Katie would leave for our class at 9:30 and the boys would leave for other mountains with more challenging terrain. We would meet at 12 for lunch with everyone and then have free time to do whatever until 3 or 4pm. Drive back home, change, have dinner, shower and sleep. REPEAT.
Before leaving to the snow, this schedule sounded horrible to me because I know what it's like waking up that early and I tend to find it depressing. Doing it with about 15 other people makes it much more bearable and having a routine felt kind of good. Stable. It's why I was so disappointed that when I got back to Sydney I didn't go to bed until 4am and woke up at 2pm, ruining the perfect sleep cycle that had been created.
Lessons.This was probably what killed me the most. The first day of class I was with Dianne (Tim's sis) and Katie plus about 10 other people, with 2 instructors. We set off to our little flat snow covered area to begin the lesson. I was already tired, being a clutz meant that I couldn't comfortable or confidently walk in snow...or while holding a snowboard. Being unfit meant that I was about 10 meters behind everyone at all times =.= I'm already stressing out here.
First lesson: Skating.
This is where you strap in your leading foot into the binding and use the other foot to push the board around like as if you are on a skate board. Seems simple right? Wrong =.= The instructor chose me to go first...yay. He told me to skate infront of everyone, he didn't really say anything other than use the other foot to push and don't let your back foot go past the back binding or you will end up doing the splits/falling. So...I pushed. I lost control and direction, headed for a frozen creek and crashed into a pole with a warning sign on it and knocked the pole over. The fall was awkward and I was kind of wrapped around this pole unable to get up, the teacher came running over to yell at me about needing to stop when I lost control. *sigh* I didn't know how to stop...I still don't, except to purposely fall over. So you know, everyone's laughing at me and I can tell from the look on the teachers face that he knows it's going to be a longggggg day for him.
I never managed to get the hang of this but at least by the time we moved on to the next thing I had gotten comfortable with the idea of falling over on purpose. Something that everyone always seems so comfortable with =S I could never do it...not in P.E when we were forced to tackle punching bags, not when we're asked to do that stupid trust exercise or when jumping off the block in swimming. I can't let go *twitch*
2. Heel edge.
This involved climbing up a little hill, strapping in both feet and going down the mountain straight down with the board parallel to the horizon (as opposed to the usual perpendicular stance that you expect when people use boards). It was pretty simple, all you had to do was keep ur knees bent and lift your heels every time you wanted to slide forward.
This was when my first major problem arose. I couldn't stand up =S The way it's done is you strap both feet onto your board and then push yourself up without your board sliding out from under you. I couldn't get up for the life of me, every time the board would run away from me so the teacher gave up and would just pull me up every time. Going down the mountain wasn't that great either lol...I would freak out and fall, I couldn't figure out the right pressure and would move too much or just stop so hard I would fall backwards.
3. Falling leaf.
This is a continuation of heel edge. Instead of just going straight down, you slide side to side, like a falling leaf. This involved rotating your body and putting more weight on the side you want to travel on. I could hardly manage simple heel edge let alone this.
4. Toe edge.
This scared the crap out of me. It's heel edge in reverse. You go down the mountain backwards so you can't see where you are going. At the very least I could stand up in this position because it involved rolling onto your stomach.
5. Toe edge falling leaf.
same dealio but backwards. Again, no go.
6. Using the lifts.
Next we learnt how to go up the mountain using on of the lifts, either the J bar or T bar. My first lesson we used the J bar. It's this odd wheel attached to a stick, connected to rope/wire on this huge pulley system thing that ran up the mountain. You stick the wheel inbetween your legs, hold onto the stick with one arm out infront of you and the jbar travels up the mountain carrying you with it. Obviously, this didn't go well either. We were about 2 hours into the lesson by this point and I was feeling horrible as it was. Everyone had picked up everything practically the first time they tried it and I was frustrated already BUT i wasn't about to give up. It was my first day and this is important to Tim so I had to keep going, plus the two next days were non-refundable and you're crazy if you think I was going to waste $400 by not showing up to class.
I attempted the Jbar with some success...sorta, I made it up almost halfway once! =[
I kept falling over which isn't pleasant when you have a contraption stuck inbetween your thighs that keeps pulling away from you. Plus the frazzled scuttle to the side was nerve racking. You had to move out of the pathway as quickly as possible so that the next person wouldn't run you over. This is where I fucked up yet again. I had fallen over and since I couldn't actually snowboard yet I would unstrap myself and walk down the mountain with the board. While I was taking off my board I lost my grip on it and it went sliding down without me...increasing with speed and narrowly missing people as they all screamed and ran out of its way. Luckily it didn't hit anyone but when I got to the bottom of the mountain my instructor gave me an ear full and warned me that I could get kicked off the mountain for that. *sigh*
I kept trying, I must have tried at least 10 times before I sat down and tried to collect myself. I had pretty much lost it at this point and was crying at my failure. Luckily goggles and all the other snow gear kept my face hidden ^.^ My instructor came over and had a talk to me, told me to go and get a coffee or something since the lesson was almost over but I kept going. Still no luck.
Once the lesson was over the instructor came over and was all, you did great...I laughed. Then he amended his statement and said I had done great by not giving up lol...and said most people would have given up after 5 mins the way I was going. Gee...thanks. I must admit though, I have never tried so hard in my life. I've been in so many situations in P.E where I just couldn't do something and did give up, even yelled at a teacher or two for continuing to make me do something I obviously wasn't going to get in that lesson.
By the end of that first lesson I was feeling horrible, reminded of all the terrible experiences of sport back in primary and high school. Feeling alone, like a failure, everyone judging me, or laughing, excluding me because they were angry that I was slowing them down and like I was a freak for being the only one not able to do it. I hadn't felt like that, and so strongly since maybe year 10. Thankfully for me, my school didn't enforce sport after year 10. I guess most recent times I've felt like that have been with Tim...lol. The time we went jogging and he made fun of me =[ and the time we went rock climbing and I couldn't do it.
After lunch tim and uly decided to take me and katie and keep practicing. Tim actually managed to get me to skate a little. I still felt like dying inside. All I could think of was that I was letting Tim down...I still kinda feel that way, I know it's not the end of the world for him but being stuck in a place for a week with him, where all you could do was snowboard made me feel like the second we got back to Sydney he was going to break up with me for being such a failure.
The next two days of classes didn't go much better. I still feel sorta proud of myself for even showing up. I couldn't talk to anyone about how I was feeling since the only person I had around was Tim and I know he doesn't understand this, he's never gone through anything like this and I didn't want to ruin his trip even more. The 2nd day I decided to re-take the first lesson while everyone else moved up to the 2nd class. This got me nowhere. Halfway through the lesson this instructor told me I was holding back the class and left me behind so I kept practicing on my own. The 3rd day, I redid the first lesson yet again since I still couldn't do a thing. This class was a little better, FINALLY there were some students who were as incompetent as me so I didn't feel as bad for not being able to get it. I even managed to stand up on my own FINALLY. I was so proud that I msged tim haha. Sadly after lunch when he was all excited for me to show him, I could no longer do it anymore. I wanted to kill myself. By this point Katie and Dianne had gotten good enough to start going to other mountains with the guys and I still couldn't stand up.
I had another little meltdown, this time with Tim around and he tried to make me feel better. Didn't work.
I felt so bad during this trip. I wanted to be happy and friendly with everyone but not being able to snowboard was realllllly affecting my mood and everyone could see I wasn't myself. I felt bad, I knew Tim's parents and family must have thought I was an ungrateful mean brat and I was even getting snappy with Tim's friends. I was even starting to get annoyed at their jokes. I didn't understand or find anything they said funny. Way too geeky for me to comprehend and it was just building on the fact that I already felt left out because I couldn't board or go anywhere with them.
The 4th day I actually had a really good time lol. The rest of the trip I spent sitting around the cafeteria or in the car listening to the Harry Potter audio books and playing iphone games. I was really enjoying myself and time was flying by. Except no one believed me, now they suddenly took concern and kept asking me if I was okay on my own =.= BAH I'm an only child AND an internet addict. I relish in spending time alone, especially since when we would get back to the house there was no privacy or silence anywhere.
Things went better from there on...until Friday. *sigh*
Tim showed up for lunch with no other than {insert name}. I feel bad bitching online but there's no real way around it in order to tell my story. She's this girl from Tim's uni, I don't like her because of stuff that's happened in the past. Most of my jealous rage does not have a leg to stand on (in this case) but that doesn't mean I let it go. I have my reasons and they're perfectly justified considering. I hate that this makes me sound like a crazy jealous gf but I'm not that bad comparatively. This is the ONE person I have issues with and her showing up SIX FUCKING HOURS AWAY FROM SYDNEY just randomly, pissed me off. Not just that, but she can ski like a pro, so off went Tim to another mountain with this chick to do the one thing I had wanted to be able to do with him so badly. Leaving me behind, alone, cold in a car listening to fucking Harry Potter.
Like I said, I like spending time alone and this situation was perfectly comfortable until Tim left with her. *sigh*Obviously, I was a bitch about it, totally passive aggressive about it for the rest of the day. Adding another pile of shit to the things I was stressing over. There was one day left on the slopes for Tim and I didn't want to ruin his last day, I know how much he loves it and he wont get to go back for a whole year. Plus I knew I couldn't be mad...he didn't do anything wrong lol. I was just frustrated by how much better she is in terms of what he looks for in a girl. BUT COME ON! SIX HOURS AWAY...=.=
The next day, I let it go, I tried to be nice so we could wrap this trip up and move on. It all ended fine and things are slowly returning back to normal but I've really been trying to find where I stand right now. I think I just need to give it more time to let the dust settle.
SO that was the snow folks. Miserable for me, but hey this is the most snow that has fallen for awhile and we were lucky to have experienced that. Too bad I don't give a fuck =D
anywho, pics and then I need to go to bed. I need to go to another orientation day tomorrow.
Also, I hate white. The lack of colour drained me, I was very glad to return to our colour-filled metropolis. If there had just been a tad more evergreen trees I would have been happier.
Seeing this on the way to lessons every morning made me want to die just that little bit more every morning XD
Anywho. I also still need to do a post about the poor fate of Warren's leg soon which is LONG overdue.
gnight!!
xx
